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Winning ‘Sheep Envy’ Contest Entries

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Late last month we launched our “Sheep Envy Contest” with SmartWool, asking readers to fill in the blank on the statement “I envy merino sheep and their fine wool because. . .”. The prize was 10 SmartWool ‘Merino Suits,’ five for men and five for women, each including a head-to-toe spread of performance merino apparel from SmartWool’s finest stock.

Well, more than 300 of you responded, and this week we’ve tasked ourselves to find a few of the best. We’ve read and sorted through innumerable terrible sheep puns of the “ewe” and “baaaad” variety. Body hair was a reoccurring theme, as was envy of New Zealand, where many of the merino sheep live.


Men’s prize: SmartWool Lightweight Crew, Lightweight Bottom, and PhD Outdoor Light Crew socks.

In the end, these 10 responses below struck as the best, be them funny, true, strange, or something of a mix of all three. Congrats to our “Sheep Envy” winners, and thanks to SmartWool for sponsoring a fun contest to illustrate the superior and “envious” qualities of natural merino wool.

Winning entries to “I Envy Merino Sheep And Their Fine Wool Because. . .”

. . . because the only thing closer than “next to skin” is “attached to skin.” — Posted by Fletcher Hamel, 03/27/2012 06:02 PM

. . .because they have the sweetest birthday suit in town. — Posted by Steve Bobusch, 03/27/2012 11:57 AM

. . . because they can run, bike, hike, hang, sleep, anywhere whenever and not have to think twice if they’re wearing the proper gear. Yes, sheep can totally bike. — Posted by Lauren, 03/28/2012 03:39 PM

. . . because I got the short end of the evolutionary stick during insulation selection, and now must spend my days lusting after warm, Smart and wooly traits. — Posted by Madeleine Carey, 03/27/2012 11:18 AM

. . . because I’m an alpaca, and before merino sheep, it was my hide that was getting sheared all the time. Now that merino is all the rage and the demand for alpaca is in decline, I’ve been adopted by a nice family in Wisconsin who’s only interested in me for my droppings (as fertilizer for their organic garden). Thank you merino sheep! Sucks to be you. — Posted by Chris Duerkop, 03/27/2012 12:22 PM

. . . because they get to hang out in the bucolic New Zealand countryside without flying 20 hours and dealing with ridiculous jet lag. — Posted by Naomi, 03/27/2012 02:20 PM

. . . because I want to be a sheep with fur all over my body then I would not:
ENVY the goat in the other pasture, the grass would be greener with my
MERINO wool bodysuit from Smartwool that keeps me warm so all the
SHEEP will start to envy me for my sleek, colorful undergarments
AND I will be hooked for life, there will be more than just all of
THEIR Smartwool socks in my drawers and on my feet, I would feel just
FINE in that amazing fabric from head to toe, I could just say ‘more
WOOL!’ — Posted by LKJ, 03/27/2012 04:20 PM


Women’s prize: SmartWool Lightweight Crew, Lightweight Bottom, and PhD Outdoor Light Crew socks.

. . . because if I had my own coat of wool I would never have to attempt to look good while wearing three layers of from fitting clothing. There would be no more bunching or riding up or lamenting the static electricity. Plus, someone else would take care of all of my haircuts. — Posted by Camille, 03/30/2012 01:57 PM

. . . because they:
Live in New Zealand…Check
Free room and board…Check
Free healthcare…Check
Free haircuts…Check
Hmm, what’s not to envy.
— Posted by Rob H, 03/27/2012 01:21 PM

. . .SmartWool envy is what I feel when I view
those curly white woolens a’worn by that ewe.
Warm on cold nights and dry in the heat—
a Merino soft suit that could hardly be beat.
Out under the stars or on a trail hike,
GearJunkie equipped, I think I would like.
— Posted by Jon, 03/27/2012 07:26 PM

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