YETI ‘Brick’ Is One Burly Bottle Opener

Stainless steel and a whopping 3/4 pound, the YETI Brick is quite possibly the burliest bottle opener we’ve tested.

Ok, I’ll say it: You don’t need a YETI Brick. It’s overkill. You can use a Bic lighter to open a bottle. You can use the edge of picnic table, or a little one dollar keychain opener.

But if you hold a Brick, you’ll probably want one. I mean, this is a bottle opener that would help you win a fight. It’s weapons grade, solid stainless steel.

Out of curiosity, I put the Brick on a postal scale. It weighs 12.4 ounces. So yeah, the bottle opener weighs more than a bottle of beer.

Beyond its mass, the thing is pretty much what you’d expect of a bottle opener built for the apocalypse. Open a beer, then use it like a roll of quarters to punch a zombie.

“But will it open a beer?” Glad you asked. Let me see. Stout? Pilsner? Nah, this is a job for an Imperial IPA, 13 percent alcohol.

Ahhh, yum. Now where were we.

Oh, the bottle opener? Yeah, it works. And you can’t have it. This one’s mine. Get your own.

As with all things YETI, it’s expensive ($50), and built to outlast an engagement ring diamond. The only downside is it’s made oversees. At this price it would be nice to see it manufactured domestically. But still, it’s sweet, and the workers in the Philippines have done a good job of polishing it smooth.

Do you need one? Heck no. Do you want one? Well, pick one up and tell me no. I dare you.

But you have to hustle. The Brick goes on sale Thursday, Sept. 15, and is limited edition, according to the company, “available as long as supplies last.”