Dating apps are hell. Finding someone to date isn’t just looking for a needle in a haystack these days: It’s more equivalent to looking in the haystack while being shot at. And it’s even harder if you’re looking for an outdoorsy person to date.
As a chronically single millennial woman, I know the horrors of the apps all too well. I’ve been looking for the right outdoorsy guy for years, and am still looking. I talked with the rest of the GearJunkie team, and realized they shared most of my gripes with the apps. Regardless of your age or gender, there are certain dating app red flags you should avoid.
The Most Common Dating App Mistakes
Nature Photography
Stop wasting real estate. You could be a landscape or nature photographer who is so talented that your work has ended up in National Geographic, and I still don’t want to see those photos on your profile.
Your photo of a bird, sunset, waterfall, or mountain may be stunning, but it tells me nothing about you. People want to see you, a person — not a mountain or a horse. Instead, list photography as an interest in your profile or bio, or if there’s a cool photo of you photographing something, add that in.
Dogs Are Cool, but Not That Cool
Outdoorsy people tend to have a dog (and by no means are we anti-dog — a bunch of us staff have one). But never use your dating profile to just show a close-up shot of your dog. One photo of you and your dog is great. Also, be careful not to make your whole bio about your dog.
One of our male writers, Andrew McLemore, recalls seeing women’s bios where every answer revolves around their canine friends. We should learn more about your personality on your profile than your dog’s.
Not. Having. A. Single. Good. Photo. Of. You.
You’ve been somewhere cool. Neat.
We don’t need to see a wide landscape shot of you on a mountain where you look like a tiny speck. Or you in a group shot with ten other people. People on apps want to see your face.
Of course, being photographed can be uncomfortable, but you’ve got to have at least one in-focus shot where you’re alone, and we can see your face, without a hat or sunglasses. Try getting a close friend to take a shot of you outside while you’re just having a conversation: Keep it relaxed, and as everyone loves to tell women: smile more.
No Variety
We get it. You climb. Do you do anything else?
No dating app profile can truly show who you are as a person (it’s six photos and a blurb, after all), but it’s worthwhile to try to show different sides of yourself in your profile. As much as I love climbing, if a guy’s profile only had photos of him climbing, that’d be a turn-off. I — and I would hope most people — am looking for a curious, well-rounded person with diverse interests.
As much as possible, try to show that off in your profile. Maybe there’s a pic of you climbing, one of you playing chess, one where you’re with friends on a beach, etc. Whatever moves you, put that on display.
Stop With the Strava Updates
If you’re a runner or cyclist, more power to you, but you have to chill out with your Strava. Someone being overly zealous with the app is particularly a problem in states like Colorado that have a huge outdoorsy culture, but you’ve probably met this type: They brag about their runs, post Strava updates constantly on their Instagram, and treat their Garmin like an emotional security blanket. Tracking your workouts is normal. Acting like a Strava account is a personality is not.
“If you want a life partner to be your running partner — maybe stick to the run clubs instead of dating apps. A love of the outdoors is one thing, but most potential mates don’t care about the PR you set at last month’s 5k,” McLemore agreed.
Not Being Clear With Politics
Weird times, folks. Get this over with early.
Outdoorsy folks’ political beliefs can run the full gamut, from ultra conservative to extremely liberal. Whatever you believe, I’d foreground that or mention that in your profile. Most apps these days have a section where you can list your political beliefs.
This helps avoid any awkward conversations later down the line. I am more of a granola-girl liberal type, and once ended up on a date with an outdoorsy guy who I thought was cool. Then I found out he thought we should be able to kill pandas. It would’ve saved us both an hour if I knew that from the get-go.
I Don’t Want to See Dead Animals
If there is one universal cliché photo on apps, it’s a guy holding a fish. It’s gotten so ubiquitous that there are memes and Instagram reels about it. If you fish, that’s awesome. Even if it’s your greatest passion in life, don’t post a photo of you holding a fish, or reeling one in. At this point, it’s basic and unoriginal, and has essentially become meaningless. Almost every straight woman I know complains about it. Instead, try a photo of you out paddling on a river, or hanging on a boat. It’s fishing adjacent, but not cringe.
The same ethos applies for hunters. If you’re out in the woods shooting a deer to make your supper, I tip my hat to you. Unfortunately, however, I still don’t think you should put that in your profile. If I’m scrolling through your photos, and go from seeing you smile on a hike to seeing a bloody, dead deer, it’s a bit disconcerting.
Our GJ Hunt & Fish Editor, Rachelle Schrute disagrees. “I’m no gun nut, but I am a hunter, so I would want to know if someone fits my lifestyle. There’s no need for blood and gore, but I’d totally be interested in seeing your shots from last season. I am in the field hunting a lot. If I were looking for someone, I’d want to know that they are, too (or at the very least cool with me being gone all of September),” she said.
Regardless of where you stand on this debate, it’s worth being thoughtful with your photos. If you’re a hunter or angler, try to be original, or at least keep the focus on you, and not a bloody animal.
What a Good Outdoorsy Dating Profile Actually Does
There’s one core premise that applies to dating app profiles: This is something that you have total control over. A dating app profile is how you deliberately choose to present yourself to the world, and presumably, if you’re trying to date, you want to present the best version of yourself possible. People are superficial and will make the decision to swipe left or right in a nanosecond, but that doesn’t mean that your profile isn’t worth careful thought and deliberation.
It might seem silly to do an iPhone photo shoot with a friend or spend time writing your bio, but if you’ve only got six photos and a few sentences to represent who you are as a person (as flawed as that system is), it’s best to make each bit count. A photo where you’re smiling with kind eyes can say a whole heck of a lot.
When you love an outdoor activity, it can be all too easy to treat that as a requirement for dating. I used to think it could never work with someone who wasn’t a climber. Now, I realize that the activity is less important than the person’s spirit.
Instead of looking for a photo of them on a climbing wall, I look for an adventurous, open-minded person who isn’t afraid to get a little dirty or be a bit wild. Someone doesn’t need to be an outdoor expert for me to date them. They just have to be willing to rough it a bit, and find joy in the simplicity of nature.
